How To Find Someone On A Chat Line When You Are Feeling Down
2020 has been such an exhausting year and it has sent people into headspaces they aren’t familiar with. However, some of us have known that darkness for a while. We’ve heard it over and over: You won’t find anyone if you aren’t happy with yourself. But it’s challenging to be happy all of the time. Dating requires a lot of energy and not everybody has all of that happiness and energy to devote to dating, despite deeply hoping to find love.
When you date, certain things are expected of you. Vulnerability, trusting others, facing possible rejection, and more. It’s a high-risk activity for someone who is predisposed to sadness. So it’s not an easy thing to do when you are already feeling low.
Finding someone while you are feeling down is a possibility. It’s not off the table just because you are going through a difficult emotional time. However, it is important to keep some things in mind when you are dating while at a low point. Below you’ll find a list of things to remind yourself of before you call into a chat line. It will help you make connections on the line without letting your emotional weight get in the way of your dating life.
Try talking to a professional
Chat line dating is not therapy. It’s not the place to come where you can let out all of your feelings. Don’t call into the line expecting to find someone who can help you with your issues. You should instead try to let those feelings out in another way. If therapy isn’t your bag, you can try meditation, speaking with friends, or engaging in hobbies that help you blow off some steam. When you call into the chat line, you want to leave your baggage at the door. In other words, don’t bring all that heavy stuff onto the call.
Don’t spill your guts on the line
Yes, vulnerability is part of dating. But you don’t want to scare away potential chat line daters by laying all your cards out on the table during that first chat line date. Instead, try bringing up lighter subjects. First chat line date topics should be unique, fun to answer, and lighthearted. If you bring up too much heavy material, you are going to dampen the experience of your match, who likely isn’t going to ask you for a second chat line date.
If you’re calling to talk about it, use the chat line for friendship
People sometimes do call into the chat lines because they need someone to talk to. It’s not ideal for dating but could work if you are looking to make local friends. If you are seeking someone to talk to via chat line about your problems, make that known in your greeting. That way, you will attract the kind of friends who are interested in helping and not daters who will be shocked to hear the hard stuff you’ve got going on in your life. Using a chat line for friendship is actually more common than you might think!
Make sure you are ready to be dating
Not everyone is in a good place to be dating. Remember that it’s an emotionally risky activity. If you are feeling extremely sad or low, dating usually isn’t the answer to your problems. Chat line dating feels a lot safer because you don’t have to put all the energy into getting ready or going on a dinner date, but it’s still dating. Take your emotional wellbeing seriously enough to know whether or not you are ready to be chat line dating right now.
Manage your expectations
Not every chat line phone call is going to lead to fireworks or a relationship. Sometimes the time put into a phone dating platform is a bust. On the other hand, it could work out really well. You really just never know how it’s actually going to be for you so manage your dating expectations when you call the line. Keep an open heart and be receptive to the possibility of finding love, but understand that it might take a few calls before you find that amazing chat line date.
Maintain a self-care routine
Chat line dating can be a form of self-care, but it’s not the whole routine. It’s a way to be social, meet others, and do something great for yourself. In those ways, it can be very helpful. But again, it’s not the whole enchilada when it comes to taking care of yourself. Do some things for yourself outside of the chat line call. It might be exercising, a personal spa day, talking to a therapist, or keeping a hobby. Whatever it is, it’s going to be specific for you and you alone. Maintaining a self-care routine will help you in your dating life in ways that you don’t even realize!
Chat line dating while bummed out isn’t easy, but if you keep these tips in mind while you are surfing the lines for a soulmate, you just might find what you are looking for. Remember too that chat lines aren’t a cure for sadness. Approaching your feelings will require work and help outside of that phone dating service. However, dating doesn’t have to be out of reach for you. You can still date even if you aren’t feeling like your happiest self!
(If you like this, you’ll love Why Chat Lines Are Great If You Just Got Dumped)